


The Good, the Bad, and the Broken

by theduckconspiracy



Category: Captain America (Movies), Iron Man (Movies), Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man (Tom Holland Movies), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Domestic Violence, F/M, Father-Son Relationship, Loss, M/M, Mental Health Issues, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-07-27
Updated: 2020-07-27
Packaged: 2021-03-06 04:16:00
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,991
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25557211
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/theduckconspiracy/pseuds/theduckconspiracy
Summary: Steve Rogers is a mess. His fiancee is dead and his former best friend is back in his life. Tony Stark is a wreck. Between the scars from his past, the uncertainty of his future, and the father-son relationship he's taken on, he's slowly losing it. Worse, the reappearance of Bucky Barnes threatens to destabilise their relationship and the fragile lives they've reconstructed.
Relationships: James "Bucky" Barnes & Steve Rogers, James "Bucky" Barnes/Steve Rogers, Peggy Carter/Steve Rogers, Pepper Potts/Tony Stark, Peter Parker & Tony Stark, Steve Rogers & Tony Stark
Kudos: 5





	The Good, the Bad, and the Broken

**Author's Note:**

> So this is the first chapter of a new fic I'm writing! Sorry for the long exposition at the start and the terrible summary! Comments with any thoughts are always appreciated :) Lu x

Peggy Carter had been there for Steve for every significant moment in his life since he was 16. They’d met when Peggy had been volunteering on the ward Steve was in after the surgery that had corrected his spine. Steve had asked Peggy out the moment he had been discharged, and they’d been together since. He’d attended her high school graduation, and then she’d attended his; she’d stood by him when he chose to drop out of college to pursue acting, and he’d been there for her to come home to, morning or night, when she’d first qualified and started nursing. Peggy had been there to rebuild his confidence after every failed audition, as his biggest supporter when he was only landing bit parts. Peggy had thrown an amazing party for Steve’s childhood best friend, Bucky, before he’d been deployed overseas. She’d shone on the red carpet at the release of Steve’s first major film. Had been understanding, and patient, and honestly like a saint with Bucky when he came home with PTSD and without an arm, when he’d been sleeping on their sofa and waking up every night screaming, even when she was working 16-hour shifts. She’d driven him to the emergency room because he’d been shaking too hard to be able to, the night Bucky had experienced the schizophrenic episode that had resulted in him trying to kill himself on Steve’s motorbike. Had calmed him down when he was told, a few days later, that in the process Bucky had killed four others who’d been travelling together in the opposite direction, two sets of parents. Peggy had without question gone with him to the trial, as Bucky was committed to a mental hospital indefinitely. Had quietly stepped back as Steve had gone to comfort Tony Stark, the young man who’d been sat alone at the back the entire time, pale faced and shaking. She’d nursed the hangover he’d had the next morning after he’d gotten plastered with Tony. She’d held him as he broke down, the night he’d finally realised Bucky wasn’t going to return his calls or let him visit. She’d been beaming as she proposed to him, in the little restaurant in Brooklyn where Steve had been every year on his birthday as a child. She’d held his hand through his mother’s funeral. Had understood entirely when Steve had to postpone the wedding. Been ecstatic for Tony with him when Kathy, who was better forgotten, had finally accepted Tony’s proposal. Not said a word all those nights where Tony had showed up in the early hours of the morning after their fights. Made sure to be in the theatre when Tony had to have a heart valve replaced. Accepted Steve disappearing for 48 hours to deal with Tony after he broke off his engagement. She’d never not been there for him; so, standing there without her at her funeral had felt like the world was ending.

Steve had been numb for the past week. Everything had happened so quickly. She’d been fine one minute, and the next, she’d collapsed on the floor. He’d performed CPR waiting those long minutes for the ambulance, and they’d finally managed to get her heart beating at the hospital, but it had been too late. Peggy had never woken up. He’d had a few precious hours before they’d switched off life support to say goodbye, and then she was gone. A later autopsy had revealed some underlying condition that caused all of it, but at that point Steve had stopped listening. He was having a hard-enough time comprehending that she was dead. They’d been planning the wedding hours before. Steve had brought up children.

Peggy being gone hadn’t fully landed until they’d lowered her into the ground, and Steve had thrown a handful of soil onto her coffin. He’d left shortly after, Tony squeezing his shoulder and leading him away from the scattered remnants of Peggy’s family (who’d never really liked him) to the nearest bar, where they’d proceeded to get blackout drunk before 9pm. They’d collapsed in a heap on the floor of Tony’s penthouse, both hysterical, laughing until Tony passed out and Steve started crying.

....

Tony didn’t like to think of himself as an alcoholic, because his father had been one, and he refused to be like his father. Sure, he always had a bourbon in hand, but that was just his style. If he didn’t acknowledge his drinking as a problem, it wasn’t one. Waking up on the floor of his apartment, fully dressed, with limited recollections of the previous night was taking it a bit far, granted, but it had happened before. And he had been to a funeral.   
He groaned and slowly sat up, keeping his eyes firmly shut until he was quite sure that he wasn’t going to vomit.  
After about 15 minutes of controlling his breathing and pressing the heels of his palms into his eyes to settle his stomach, Tony staggered to his feet. There was no sign of Steve in the open-plan living room/kitchen, so he drifted over to the bathroom. Sure enough, Steve sat leant up against the wall next to the toilet, looking extremely worse for wear. Tony leant against the door frame, smirking.

“Morning, Rogers.”

Steve groaned in response. 

“I am never going to be able to move. Just leave me here.”

Tony rolled his eyes. 

“I’ll be back for you.”

He slunk out of the bathroom and towards the kitchen, pulling the orange juice out of the fridge and chugging half the carton before slumping down at the island and flicking the coffee pot on. Tony had forgotten that other people got hangovers – Steve could be out for the rest of the day. At least he might temporarily think about something other than Peggy. The guy was clearly a mess, and if he was honest, he had no idea how to deal with it.  
After another couple of minutes questioning his choices, Tony produced his phone and scrolled through his emails. Most of it was just the usual updates from Pepper (who was currently covering for him whilst he looked after Steve), but there were a couple, including one from May Parker, that Tony made a mental note to deal with when he felt slightly more functional. He was just starting to skim the earliest ones from Miss Potts, which unfortunately seemed to be rescheduling his missed meetings rather than letting him out of them, when the sound of Steve retching echoed through the apartment. 

It took a moment for Tony to convince himself to get up, and by the time he reached the bathroom Steve was stood leaning over the sink, pale faced. He pointed a finger accusingly at Tony without looking up, his other hand braced on the counter.

“I swear to God I am never again listening to your advice, Stark.”

Tony raised his eyebrows.

“I think you’ll find I actually advised against the last three rounds of tequila shots, Rogers.” He held out a cup of coffee to the man. “Drink.”

Steve glared, but accepted the cup. He slowly pushed himself upright and took a sip.

“How come you seem fine?” 

Tony pretended to consider for a moment.

“Practice.” 

He clapped his hands together and spun around, a little too violently for his admittedly still queasy stomach.

“Now, I suggest we get Happy to bring us some…” He glanced at his watch. “Let’s go with brunch, and then see if we can’t hit up another bar?”

Steve groaned, clearly having also realised that it was nearing midday.

“I can’t, I promised Peggy’s parents that we’d go for lunch before they left. Plus, I don’t think I could manage even looking at another drop of alcohol for at least a week.”

Tony turned back to look at Steve, who was shakily walking towards the kitchen, the coffee long since downed.

“You sure?”

Steve nodded, depositing the coffee cup inelegantly into the sink. 

“I haven’t spoken to them since…you know. It would be rude to cancel.”

Tony clapped a hand on his friend’s shoulder.

“Well then at least let me make Happy drive you. He doesn’t charge if you puke on the floor.”

Steve rolled his eyes. 

“Sure, if he’ll let me stop at the apartment first. I cannot meet up with the Carters in yesterday’s suit.”

Tony smirked.

“He works for me; he’ll do what I tell him.” And then, more seriously, “Just call me if you need me. Pepper’s covering for me so…just ring.”

The other man gave a half nod, the bags under his eyes suddenly more apparent.

“Thanks, Tony.” 

And then, just like that, he was gone, and Tony was alone again in the much too big penthouse. He briefly considered getting another drink, but that would be disgraceful even for him, so he settled for coffee. It was awful, but he almost felt relieved that Steve had left. It was him, and not Tony, that was good with emotions. A machine he could fix in a heartbeat, but people were much too complicated.

Eventually, he decided to do the responsible thing and ring Pepper. Steve was clearly gone for the next few hours at least, and with a shower and another ten cups of coffee he could probably make a couple of the meetings that had originally been scheduled for that afternoon. She picked up immediately.

“Is this you ringing to say you’re going missing for the rest of the week Tony, because I swear, I will strangle you.”

Tony smiled to himself. Pepper wasn’t one to be messed with.

“Au contraire, I am actually ringing to say I may be able to make my meetings this afternoon. Steve left early.”

She sighed with relief.

“Oh thank God. Osborne threw such a fit at the idea of cancelling that I nearly had to step in myself. I’ll let him know that we won’t have to push it after all.”

“To be honest you’d probably be better. I always lose interest with that man.”

Tony could almost see her roll her eyes.

“Yes, but you’re the CEO, so it’s your job.”

He ran a hand over his face.

“Don’t remind me.”

“I won’t need to as long as you’re presentable and at the office in an hour.”

“I’ll be there.”

He hung up and dragged himself towards his bedroom. It was going to be a long afternoon.

...

Steve let out a sigh as he closed the door to his apartment and slumped down onto the couch. Lunch with Peggy’s parents had been as miserable as he’d expected – all false smiles and small talk – and had been made about 10 times worse by the raging hangover he’d been nursing. The headache had finally subsided, but the pit in his stomach had if anything grown, leading him to conclude that it was caused by grief, and not last night’s bad decisions.

He flicked his phone back on (the Carters didn’t approve of phones during social functions) and was just about to make his 7th coffee of the day when it pinged, indicating a voicemail. Steve frowned. This was odd – everyone he knew just texted him if they couldn’t get through. He’d received maybe 2 in his life. Intrigued, he switched on the coffee machine before leaning back against the counter and pressing the voicemail button. As expected, the number was unfamiliar. There was a characteristic beep before the voice of an unfamiliar woman crackled through.

“Hi, this is Dannemora State Hospital. We’re contacting you as you are listed as the emergency contact for a James Buchanan Barnes? The doctors have cleared him for discharge, but he needs to be released into the custody of an appointed caretaker for a probationary period. Please contact us on this number so we can make the arrangements to release him into your care.”

Steve hung up the phone, and let it drop to the counter.

“Shit.”


End file.
